When I was struggling in my career as a teacher here in California, I constantly felt under valued and under appreciated by my administrators. My students, their parents and my colleagues loved and respected me. But not my administrators? I couldn’t understand why at that time.
But I have come to realize, upon deep reflection and internal healing that in the past, I believed my worth as a teacher was a reflection of what my bosses thought of me. So if they didn’t appreciate me, I wasn’t good enough; no matter how many other examples of success I experienced. And that led to more insecurity and doubt of my self-worth as an educator. It was a viscous cycle that had to be broken.
I am not sure I would have left teaching on my own had I not been treated so poorly and reached a breaking point. That also was an example of low self-esteem because it took hitting rock bottom to leave. What I also didn’t realize at the time was that they weren’t the problem. I was.
I attracted a toxic, low-vibe work environment by administrators who were in my eyes, selfish and self-centered. I attracted this because I was not confident, I didn’t respect and value myself enough. These feelings came about over years when even though I knew I was educated, intelligent and an amazing teacher, I felt inferior because of my health issues.
At times, in the past, I just wasn’t enough in my eyes, so I reflected that back in my life from my bosses, never my students which was because in the physical classroom with my students, I was confident and possessed self-respect.
The Covid years (lol) brought me back to myself, to my true self, and with that came my confidence and self-respect. I had to rebuild my sense of self-worth and self-love during this time that I had sworn to quit teaching forever.
But the irony is that the more I found my root self, my soul’s purpose became clear again. And that’s when I thought about going back to teaching.
But I vowed to myself that this time would be better. This time would be different. This time I will attract a positive, uplifting and rewarding work environment where I am valued and respected.
I wrote that post it note when I was looking for teaching jobs in the Spring of 2022.
In June of 2022, I landed exactly that type of job-teaching high school English in a private school in Orange County. My administrators respect me, value me, appreciate me and really sought me out! I had never experienced that before as an educator and it is incredibly rewarding to know you are valued by all parties: students, parents, staff and administrators.
I’m starting my second year in the fall and it is still the same. Things are great and I’ve never been happier as a teacher.
This is not the first time I have manifested what I wanted from writing things down, but we attract from our highest point. So if there are areas in life where you are insecure, you will attract insecurity in that area of life.
But when we manifest from a place of confidence, self-love and self-worth, not only do we get what we want, but we get exactly what we truly deserve. Our highest point of attraction is what we will end up manifesting. And that’s a desire everyone in the world deserves to have.
It is up to us to work on our inner healing and growth. Then we can see our inner self reflected back to us in the outer world.